Sunday, May 10, 2009

Bonne Chance: Feral Redemption

Just after one evening meal with Bonne Chance, I returned inside and began doing the dishes. The only good thing about doing the dishes is I can look out the kitchen window while Im at it. From there I can see a small part of the garden, where a prickly Grevillia 'Scarlet Sprite' is planted.

This shrub is very popular with the birds, and lucky me, there was a White Plumed Honeyeater hovering about it, taking nectar from the flowers, as they do.

I was enjoying the show - wondering if it would last long enough for me to get the camera, when into this visions periphery, a low slung, fast moving, blur slunk in, and came to rest beneath the shrub.

I was out there in a heartbeat, and well timed it was. The honeyeater hovered, oblivious, just a foot and a half above the head of Bonne Chance, who was in prime position to pounce upward and claim his prize.

Just as his legs began to propel him, I clapped my hands sharply three times, adding a harsh verbal "NUH-UH!" for emphasis. Instantly the honeyeater took off to parts unknown.

Bonne Chance first landed awkwardly on the spiky shrub, wriggled his way off a stout branch, and then fell to the ground. There he proceeded to walk casually back to the sunny side of the garden and made every effort to pretend he had meant the whole thing to happen just exactly the way it did.

I, however, stood still, suddenly feeling sickly concerned about the lack of Little Wattle Bird sightings of late.

Getting ahold of my thoughts, I wandered over to my furry friend and at that invisible 'three foot mark', I crouched down, intent on having a deep and meaningful conversation.

I said "Hey Mate, I know its in your nature, but could you NOT do that HERE? I mean, you cant even be hungry after that dinner...(he yawned!!!)...I know! I know! Opportunity only knocks once, but Mate, the birds are friends of mine too."

Just then, a mob of Common 'Indian' Mynas came through, prompting me to add "Except that lot - you can have all of those you want!"

And thats when it suddenly dawned on me! Well, yes, but besides my being a complete hypocrite...


I will make up a set of flash cards - Birdy Flash Cards! And I will instruct Bonne with me here for a minute...For example: show him the Rainbow Lorikeet flash card and say "NO! Not yummy!" Then show him the Common 'Indian' Mynas flashcard and say "Go for it!" while simultaneously giving him a tasty little treat!

After I have him trained, he can help me recruit other feral cats. Together we will form a mighty Army of Ferals!

We will sweep across Australia wiping out non-indigineous birds thus reducing pressures on our native bird populations!

And One Great Day, Australia will no longer deride the Feral cat! But herald them as some of our Nation's great Heroes!


Melanie said...

Utterly brilliant! Ill have some of those.

BetteJo said...

My goodness what great aspirations you have! Let us know how it works out!

kj said...


you'll be running for national office next, with such great aspirations and ideas.


Anonymous said...

I'll check back in to see if the flashcards work. Cheers!

Anonymous said...

Hi, Lavender